As I browse my social media feeds I notice so many people are fed up and unsure of the direction of their lives. It reminded me of a post I wrote a couple of years ago when my son was stressed about what he would do with his life. Fast forward nothing he even considered was to be his path; life took him in a totally different direction. And it’s more than ok not only for him, but for any of us questioning where we are and what direction we are headed.
I share the original post (with some minor tweeks) here:
The age old question we ask our kids seems to be “What do you want to be when you grow up”? We ask toddlers, we ask our tweens and we even pressure our high school seniors to “choose” what they want to be for the rest of their lives. We push and push until they pick something, anything, and is it “best” thing.
Don’t get me wrong, I believe we all have to grow up and move forward with some type of plan, but I’m watching my college freshman who is torn between multiple interests and is feeling the pressure to choose. I realize that once he went off to college the pressure really began to build in a whole new way. And it began with choosing classes.
By the middle of their first year of college, a 19 year old student who is just figuring out how to adjust to living outside of the family, is forced to choose a path with the objective being to “graduate on time” and get a job. They are told that they need to pick a major early on because by doing so they have a better chance at being successful.
No wonder our young adults get overwhelmed. No wonder they feel “bad” that they don’t know what to do with their lives. It’s hard enough to keep up with classes, studying, social activities and well just being in college, and on top of it we put this a “ticking time bomb” on their lives suggesting that they had better figure it all out and soon or else….FAILURE is soon to follow. [click to continue reading …]
Talking about our son’s experience with depression, addiction and suicide and founding DASIUM.net has been a passion of mine. Embracing his recovery (and my own work in Ala-non) has given us a freedom and quality of life that I am humbly grateful for. I’m thrilled to share information and this article by the incredible Jennifer McGregor. I hope you get as much out of it as I did!
Embracing Sobriety: Positive Ways to Treat Yourself
By: Jennifer McGregor
Recovering from an addiction is no easy feat. It takes courage, strength, and support from others as well relearning how to live your life without the addiction. Some people can find sober living difficult and fantasize about the thrill of their addiction. While treatment and healthy habits are important, it is also important to relearn how to enjoy life and how to have fun without the aid of a substance. Life is full of fun and wonder. Here are a few things you can do to help yourself find it again.
Visit a Natural Wonder
One of the best ways to remind yourself about the majesty of life and this planet is to go out and spend some time with nature’s miracles. No matter where you live, there is always some monument, landmark, or wilderness area nearby. Take advantage of your state’s natural beauty. Some great pilgrimages to take for those who want to go out of state might be Moab, UT, the Oregon Coast, Yellowstone, the Everglades, and the Grand Canyon.
Learn the Skill You Always Wanted To [click to continue reading …]
As we navigate military life, we are no strangers to change. We move and move again, we raise our children together and alone, we juggle our finances, and handle deployments. We are wonder woman each and every day, and funny thing is that these are just the most obvious things that we handle on a regular basis. In this crazy military life, change is common, and how we deal with it can make or break us. Change happens and developing the ability to change with it is the key to thriving in this world of ours.
So often when we are met with change we respond with resistance, and looked at it as a source of stress. But I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t need to be that way. What if you could think about change in a whole new way? What if the next time your soldier walked in the door with some “news” instead of getting frustrated, you could find the silver lining? What if the idea of an upcoming change brought about excitement and inspiration instead of stress and resentment? It can be that way, and for many of us it is!
Change doesn’t have to be something to fear. Change can be something that gives us a fresh start, a new attitude and a brighter future. It’s the knowing how to “handle” it that makes all the difference. Over the years I have watched people who move through change with ease and have even been “one of them” a time or 2. What I noticed was that those who transitioned easily did something that the rest of us didn’t. They changed with the change and they used the following steps. With these steps you can prepare and shift your mindset to bring new life into your reality and a smile to your face that will have you prepared for any situation that comes your way.
6 Steps to Change
[click to continue reading …]
You may have noticed I’ve been a little quiet lately. Between the passing of my mother-in-law, supporting my husband, handling military life and dealing with all the feelings of my own, I haven’t had the focus to do much else than the bare necessities. And I have been feeling guilty for taking a much-needed time out from anything that drains me physically or emotionally and just staying in my corner to “reset” myself.
The past 2 months took a toll on me in so many ways, but it also taught me so much about myself, my life and the things I’ve done wrong. I guess “wrong” isn’t the best word, but the reality is that since helping take care of my father and then just recently my mother-in-law as they lost their battles with cancer, I haven’t done the best job at allowing myself to grieve. Sure I talk the talk, but if I’m honest with myself, walking the walk hasn’t been happening.
This time it wasn’t about deployment or being a military spouse, it wasn’t about being “mom”, it wasn’t about any of the stuff that life has put into my path, but it was rather a building up of putting myself and my feelings on the back burner. And while that’s ok for a very short period of time…long term it doesn’t work so well. [click to continue reading …]