All posts,  Military Lifestyle Advice

15 Ways to Enhance Your Military Romance

Busy mom’s take care of a lot, busy military spouses even more. From juggling kids, a home and your service member to running a business and thriving in your career, navigating military life is often like a powder keg waiting to explode. And while I know that escaping into the latest in a pile of romance books sounds appealing, I’m going to tell you it’s even more important to enhance the romance at home and it’s time to “bring sexy back” to your relationship with your service member. I get it I do, and like you with everything else going on romance is the farthest thing from my mind. But seriously, it’s easy for the candles and military romance to take a dive so I’m here to help!

First off let me just say that isn’t that I’m not interested or don’t love my soldier, but the fact of the matter is when life gets crazy and I don’t have enough time to get to the bottom of my to do list romance is the first thing to go. So I thought I’d do us all a solid and create a simple list that we can refer to when it gets a little chilly on the home front that will help ignite the spark, put some fire back into your life AND enhance the romance at home! Feel free to add your go to strategies in the comments!

15 Ways to Enhance Your Military Romance

  1. Prepare a Romantic Meal. My grandma used to say that the way to the heart is through the stomach. If you really want to make your way to your lover’s heart try preparing a romantic meal. Not only does it show much you care, it creates the right ambience for the sparks to fly.
  2. Watch A Movie. A romantic movie is a great idea to spend a great evening together. Snuggle up with a movie and enjoy spending time together. (And leave the devices in another room!)
  3. Say it with words. Making a list, remembering and sharing some of your romantic memories with your lover can actually turn them on. Leaving a note in their lunch works great too! 
  4. Do chores together. Wash the dishes along with your lover. Strip the beds together. Even the small little things can mean a lot in life and the act of working together shows that you care about each other and share in the responsibilities at home.
  5. Do something out of the norm. A trip to the museum, a walk in a new part of town or any other place of interest that is unique tells our partner that we want to experience something new together.
  6. Be mindful of the little things. Little things can go a long way in saying “I Love You”. A simple act like holding open a door or asking if you can get the other person something from the kitchen. It’s those little daily reminders that you have each other’s best interest at heart that makes the difference.
  7. Brag about each other in public. Brag to your friends or family and tell them about the person in your life you value the most. Let others know how fortunate you are to share your life with your spouse and how much you value each other.
  8. Touch each other! Physical touch is very important in any relationship. Small touches speak louder than a thousand words. While walking together just put a gentle hand around a shoulder or hold hands. It makes us feel warm, secure and loved. Do not hesitate in giving your lover a hug. There is really no right time to express your feelings and a simple touch says “I Love You” and that you mean the world to me.
  9. Make Time For Each Other Learn to take time for your partner however busy your schedule may be and for pete’s sake put your devices down. How much time has gone by since you worked on keeping your relationship young and fresh? It is important to make the other person feel special and desired and what better way than making time for each other especially when things are really busy?
  10. Do it now Do not wait for Valentines Day to show how much you love your sweetheart. Even sharing an inexpensive box of candy, a single flower or a card for no reason goes a long way in saying that you care.
  11. Don’t Take Each Other For Granted Sometimes when you live together you forget to actually tell your partner what they mean to you, and sadly each of you can end up feeling taken for granted. Wouldn’t it be nice to find ways to remind your special someone just how lucky you are to have them in your life?
  12. Try participating in the activities your spouse loves. You could try out some of your lover’s favorite hobbies or sports, and invite them to try some of yours. Since two people are seldom exactly alike, a good relationship or marriage is one which sees the dissimilar sides of both people harmonizing together. It is built on creating new experiences that the two of you share and creating moments that are unique to your relationship. When you show how interested you are in your lover’s hobbies, it will be a pleasant surprise that you want to learn more about them and the things they like. Be simple and straightforward about it – just ask your spouse to teach you or include you in their hobby because you want to be part of the fun. Take it in a spirit of fun – laugh at any mistakes you make, and learn from them. Remember it’s about doing something together and seeing new sides of each other.
  13. Say “I Love You” in a whole new way Learn how to say ‘I love you’ in a few different languages. The words ‘I love you’ bring a smile to everyone’s face and every culture in the world has their own way of saying it. Learn a few and surprise your lover. He or she will probably be completely confused, and it can be fun to explain just what you said.
  14. Write your lover an original, romantic poem or letter. In a time where tech is so prevelant a hand written letter or poem will stand out. Hand written pieces are a beautiful way of letting your feelings show. Do not care if your attempt at poetry it is bad or silly, just let your feelings flow. Write anything you feel, be it naughty, silly or funny, and your love will cherish it forever.
  15. Say I love you when giving a romantic massage. As stated in tip #8, physical touch is very important so let’s kick it up a notch and what better way than a romantic massage. A massage by your partner can actually be a wonderful experience that can bring you closer together and connect you at a deeper level. Massage is a great way to share your time together and get to know each other in a whole new way. Plan your massage at a time when your time together will be uninterrupted.

What are some of the ways you bring sexy back into your military romance?
Share it with us in the comments below!


~Judy Davis, the Direction Diva is a motivational speaker, author and lifestyle blogger as well as a military life and teen suicide prevention expert. Co-founder of DASIUM, Judy’s books Right Side Up  and Warning Signs: Is Your Teen at Risk are go to resources for families and her websites are filled with tips, inspiration and resources for those looking for direction. Connect with Judy at

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *