Life is full of challenges especially when we are hit with something unexpected. But this Direction Diva is here to tell you that no matter what your challenges are, they will make you a stronger person if you let them. For most of us, when life takes a twist and our daily lives are more difficult than normal, we want to move through the situation quickly. We just want to get it over with and move on – and the sooner the better, right?
Our thoughts begin to focus on how much better life would be if our current situation had never happened in the first place. Sometimes, I wonder if that’s really true.
Would we really be better off if
we never had to deal with life’s challenges?
I know for myself, without exception there has not been one difficult moment or experience that hasn’t helped me grow as a person in the long run. It may have taken me years to figure out the why, in fact I’m still asking WHY US when it comes to our life in crisis, but I also know that…
I am who I am BECAUSE of everything that has happened, not in spite of it.
I watch people spend their energy wishing for a better life, praying that things could be different. But instead of doing something about it, accepting what is or looking for the silver lining, they embrace a victim mentality and continue to do the same things wishing things were different.
They miss the good stuff – the magic that is there if you look hard enough because they spend all their time complaining or silently feeling sorry for themselves. Now compare that to the people who embrace their “stuff”, the individuals who don’t spend their life wishing.
That individual fighting cancer that is smiling and soaking in every moment of every day.
The child with a disability that only sees the good in people.
The person who lost their job and happily takes the first thing that comes up to so they can feed their kids.
These are the people I look up to and try to emulate. They are strong, happy and moving forward despite the hand they have been dealt.
Those people – you know the one’s you think “have it easy”- don’t. They don’t have less challenges than you do, they just understand that they need to grow from their experiences and let them go…
Now compare that to the person always whining about money, career or their relationships – ask yourself – do they ALWAYS complain about the same thing? Don’t you just sigh and think…here they go again…? I know I do.
I don’t mean to sound harsh, but until you learn to accept your life – all of it – you can’t move on. And that’s a good thing.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to learn the same key lessons over and over because I was to caught up in the life isn’t fair cycle rather than accepting what was and doing something about it. For years I was stuck in the “same crap different day” mindset and spent more time using the excuse that other people had it easier rather than getting off my butt and changing my situation.
For me it was boundaries and balance, for you it may be something different. Life happens and we all have tough times. But those who learn from them and become stronger in spite of them know something that I didn’t.
They know that who they are is a direct result of what they have been through. They embrace that fact, the good, the bad and the ugly and use it to grow stronger. And that… is something to aspire to.
What do you aspire to?
~Judy Davis, the Direction Diva is a motivational speaker, author and lifestyle blogger as well as a military life and teen suicide prevention expert. Co-founder of DASIUM, Judy’s books Right Side Up and Warning Signs: Is Your Teen at Riskare go to resources for families and her websites are filled with tips, inspiration and resources for those looking for direction. Connect with Judy at TheDirectionDiva.com
As I browse my social media feeds I notice so many people are fed up and unsure of the direction of their lives. It reminded me of a post I wrote a couple of years ago when my son was stressed about what he would do with his life. Fast forward nothing he even considered was to be his path; life took him in a totally different direction. And it's more than ok not only for him, but for any of us [...]
You may have noticed I've been a little quiet lately. Between the passing of my mother-in-law, supporting my husband, handling military life and dealing with all the feelings of my own, I haven't had the focus to do much else than the bare necessities. And I have been feeling guilty for taking a much-needed time out from anything that drains me physically or emotionally and just staying in my[...]
Sometimes as we traverse military life it can feel as though we live separately from the outside world. We have our own lingo, we take pride in things others take for granted and our day to day challenges are very different from our civilian counterparts. Because of this we need to build stronger coping skills and hone our self care strategies so that we are prepared - especially for the stuff[...]
Have you ever noticed that sometimes in military life it seems as though every time you turn around someone or something just keeps getting in the way of your dreams? It may feel like for every idea you have or action you take there is someone out there telling you it can't be done or how it won't work. They may even share a suggestion as to how to do it "the right way".
After church [...]
As we kick off Mental Health Awareness Month I want to begin with some insight that my son had over the weekend into how social media really steals the joy from our lives. He shares this piece of writing with me and I was struck by how it opened my eyes to the connection between social media and our military mental health. His excerpt highlights the reality of living with the challenges of [...]
I'm inclusive, I reach out to the newcomer, I'm supportive of all military spouses and I love my military life. I'm all of these things; UNTIL I'm not. And today it's been brought to my attention that without realizing it we have once again alienated the male military spouse. Don't see it? Neither did I...that is until today.
This morning as I was sharing information on a free military [...]
Last night I attended an event that is part of a week long tradition among the Engineer Regiment. As part of military life and regimental week here on Fort Leonard Wood, military spouse events are as much a part of the weeks powerful lineup as the laying of the wreath ceremony, best sapper competition or the Regimental Ball. And this years Engineer Spouses Night Out didn't disappoint.
Military spouse, Judy Davis, is a motivational speaker, entrepreneur, published author and co-founder of DASIUM. She is an expert in military life, small business success and suicide prevention in teens/young adults.